When you’re thinking of getting a divorce there is really only one question you need to ask yourself.  The question is if I was going to be single the rest of my life, never marry again, never live with another man (or woman) would I still want to get a divorce? (Because that is a real possibility.) If the answer is yes then it is over.

          The other questions, kids, money, relatives, work, ECT. All of that are just the details of the split.  If being alone the rest of your life looks better than where you are at, then a loaf of bread is done a long time before you smell it burning.

          There are two things you need to watch out for. One is do you have your eye on someone else that you’re basing you’re decision to separate on with the hope something will come of it?
         
           That is La La land, and changing your entire life on what you think something might be like can be completely opposite of what it turns out to be.  The fantasy is ALWAYS better than the reality. Reality is what you can live with and what you like and what you can live with are usually two completely different things.

          The next is your expectations in a divorce. That everyone will be nice and fair.  My dad had a famous saying he said, “Linda a man doesn’t feed a woman he doesn’t f____ or f____ a woman he doesn’t feed and is you think your ex  is going to give you anything for those kids, you’re Nuts.”
         
Reality is what you can (live) with.